Come Watson, the game is a chicken foot

DI Farmer Ann in The Case of the Missing Eggs

The following case is presented as it happened.  No names have been changed to protect anyone.
Back Story:  For two days, the inmates of "the coop" have been secretly laying their eggs in an undisclosed place within a 3 acre radius.  It is the job of Detective Inspector Farmer Ann to discover this hideout and shut it down.

Thursday, March 31st, 0700 hours:  Perpetrators released from incarceration.  Their attention immediately focused on the corn scattered on the ground next to the open gate.  DI Farmer Ann observed the inmates carefully before leaving the scene.  All seemed normal.

0730 hours:  DI Farmer Ann saw, from the kitchen window, several of the perps meeting with their Ring Leader, JW, alias The Beak.  FA knew he was an ugly customer, expert in brutalization below the knee.  But no outward appearance of lawlessness was apparent.

0800 hours:  DI Farmer Ann left headquarters to reconnoiter.  The DI noted 5 of the perps, along with JW, in the dog pen, scratching for their ill gotten grains.  JW immediately came at the DI with beak and claw, and his greatest weapon, intimidation.  The DI fended him off with an egg carton.  After a one minute face off, JW went back to his lookout post.  The DI approached "the coop" and cautiously opened the door to have a look.  It was noted that 6 of the perps were occupying various cells, possibly engaged in lawful egg production.  The DI hastily closed the door, knowing that the perps, if disturbed while in production, can get nasty.  FA returned to headquarters.

JW with one of his molls

0830 hours:  After leaving headquarters, DI Farmer Ann noted, from the rear stoop, a large black bird taking off from the coop yard.  It landed in a tree some 100 yards away.  The DI immediately ran for a set of binoculars, suspecting fowl play.  By the time the DI got back, there was no sign of the bird.  FA entered the coop yard, trying to spot the black bird from a different angle.  No luck. But, as the DI stood watching, a lone perp was caught is some suspicious behavior.  As FA watched, the perp slowly sauntered down the wall of the headquarters, behind the heat pump units, appearing to look for any of the many lizards that hang out on the wall.  Not deceived, FA followed at a distance of 20 feet.  Suddenly, the perp darted under the front stoop of headquarters.  FA approached cautiously, squatted down and noted the perp looking innocently around.  The DI knew better.  It was clear that the perp was checking to see if the coast was clear.  But as FA was watching, the perp did nothing.  FA retreated to the other side of the stoop, out of sight.  Peering from atop the stoop steps, FA watched as the perp slowly approached the inside corner of the area beneath the stoop.

0845 hours:  At last, Success!  Just ahead of the perp, DI Farmer Ann saw a cache of about 2 dozen eggs in the corner.  But, in order to make an arrest and shut the operation down, FA had to wait for the perp to conduct her business.

1030 hours:  The illicit nest, being abandoned, was found to contain 10 illegal eggs.  DI Farmer Ann confiscated these eggs, but replaced them with two nest eggs, knowing that if the nest was shut down completely, another one would be started up elsewhere.  The DI reasoned that was better to have an illicit nest continued legally, than to try to hunt down a new location.

1045 hours:  The case of the missing eggs was closed and DI Farmer Ann proceeded to headquarters to finish the paperwork.  But the DI knew there would be more cases in the future, as JW and his girls weren't going anywhere.  The living was too good.

Bak Bak

Conspiracy theory

Drat that &*@#^)&$ Easter Bunny.  He's been and done taught my cockers to hide their eggs!  Probably to pay me out for making the garden bunny proof.  The last two days I have had a total of 4 eggs!  I thought sure that, since it was raining today, they would lay in the coop, but nope.  It's supposed to rain tomorrow too and I think I will keep them in their yard.  But the first sunny day, I gotta find the rogue nests.  6.85 acres to look in.  Geez,  I need hep.

Oh, I'm so wet and cold.  WAAAAH.  Give me food.

To top it off, our heat pump for downstairs is on the fritz and it's still cold.  I hope Jim can deal with that tomorrow.  Not an emergency, but mighty pressin'.

And, I sucked at bridge today.

And I'm WAAAAAY behind on my to do list.

And Glee is in reruns.

And I can't get my garden preped for the next planting cause of all the precipitation.

Oh No!  I didn't mean it.  I LOVE the rain.

It's a conspiracy against Farmer Ann.   Drat that &*@#^)&$ Easter Bunny.

But I'm still not letting him in the garden.

bak bak

Flower Power

Today, no dialogue, just flowers.

lovely

beautiful

exceptional

wonderful

phenomenal

brilliant

delicate

bold

GAAAAAAAHHHHH

bak bak

Snails Pace

VERY slow day today.  The thermometer never made it above 42.  It was dismal all day until around now (5:30) then the sun came out.  It's supposed to get down to high twenties tonite, so I spent some time covering my tomatoes that are in the cold frame.  The onions, chives, collards, cabbage and lettuce should be alright.  Not sure about the parsley and dill.  I may have to replant those, but I got seed.  The beet seeds are not up yet so they should be good.  Not sure about the blueberry blossoms, but if they don't make berries this year it's ok.  They need to grow.  They are so scrawny.

I went to Wilmington this AM to see my allergist and did a few errands while in town.  I completely blew my calorie count cause I couldn't resist getting some onion rings from Hardees and a hand dipped ice cream from Eagle Island.  MMMM  Smesmashio.  When I get bored, I eat.

cmmahn lady, let me in

Got home and did get the doggies out for an early walkies as I was still seriously bored.  Took a nice long walk around the clear cut area down the cove road.  Everything is getting so green and the dogwoods are blooming like mad.

I've still got to pull the plants off the porch and into my bedroom.  I'm hoping this is the last freeze of the season.  I'd like to get back into the garden to lay the irrigation and do the rest of the rows.  We'll see.

Oh, and it looks like I've only got one broody hen left.  I successfully stopped the other two.  Hopefully not forever as I would like to have chicks some day.

And that's all the news that's fit to print.

Bak Bak

Button up your overcoat

Just when the woolens were being packed up.  Boom, 40 degrees, windy, rainy and COLD.  Don't get me wrong.  I love the rainy part.  Got 1.5 inches in 24 hours and the plants that ARE in the garden are loving it.

But me and the chickens could do without the wind.  They hate it when their feathers get blown the wrong way.  If I didn't know better, I'd think they were vane.  You know...

Vain, Vane.  Either way.

Actually, they have kept a pretty low profile today and I haven't seen a lot of them.  Probably holed up in the woods somewhere.

Not too many persons at church today, so I got both quarts of goat milk.  I thought about trying for butter, but the process to get all of the cream takes way too long for me to have patience with it, so it's a double batch of cheese.  Oh Darn (kidding).

Jim dug up some of the horse radish from the garden today and it didn't seem to grow very many roots in a year.  I think I didn't fertilize it enough and maybe the soil was too acid, so I will adjust for the next planting.  Anyway, from what he did get, it is powerful stuff.  I took a whiff of the roots he processed and thought my nose was going to explode.  Whew.  This is more like mule radish.  or hoarse radish.

Know what?  Chicken Butt!

I did manage to do walkies, but had to bundle up.  Went to the river and the dogs got in the water.   Don't know how they stand it.

Well, I'm gettin' to the short rows (a new granny expression I learned today, means almost done), so I'll call it quits for now.

bak bak

Some Gardens Just Need Tillin' - Wyett (t)Urf

But not mine.  Success!  I finally finished tilling the garden, just in time for the rain.  All 1/8 inch of it.  But hey, I'm not complaining.  Some is better than none.  And my hazelnut bushes are already putting out after only being potted for 6 days.  I guess the Almanac is still my good book.

The poor chickens, though.  I've heard the expression mad as a wet hen, but mine are not mad, just so forlorn looking.

Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close up.

But, they WILL not get out of the rain, even though they have a house and three porches to choose from.  Unless it is really coming down, they will stick it out and eat.  I guess you have to have priorities.

Walkies today was uneventful, except that we heard turkeys in the near distance.  Only 5 more days to walk in the woods then spring turkey season starts for a month.  I got to find somewhere else to walk.  Dang those hunters!!

So, chickens shut up and I'm off to make the filling for my spring rolls for church tomorrow.

Bak Bak

Yah Ah Ah

Oh, I feel like Simon Legree, Snidley Whiplash, Dick Dastardly and Oil Can Harry all rolled into one.

I had another hen go broody so I had to shut them all down.  I destroyed miss broody one's nest, took the wooden eggs and put logs on top of it.  I dragged miss broody two and three off their nests (three happened yesterday), and shut them out of the coop for the afternoon.  I took all the nest eggs away.  I hope that will do it, although some sources say that a broody hen can be persistent.  We'll see.  I have to let them back in this evening.

I just don't want them to be broody right now.  I want them to tip toe through the tulips.  I want them trippin down the garden path, looking for bugs and feeling groovy.  I want them to be free and single.  They are too young to be having kids.

Ok Ok, look.  This is my lion imitation.

Also today, tilled til my toes tingled (ooooh how I LOVE a good Alliteration, and that was nothing like a good Alliteration.  Ba dump da.)  I am ALMOST finished tilling.  One more hour will do it.  And I limed and fertilized what I tilled.

Rested for a bit this afternoon but I got restless so I made some more goat cheese, made oatmeal cookies, made miso soup and marinated some snow peas, chives, bell pepper and shitake mushrooms for stir fry this evening.

Then it was time for walkies.  Today we saw a dogwood tree that had been bent double during some cutting that happened last year and it was STILL blooming.  It was bootiful and so wanted to live.  I named it Barbara Graham.

Dammit, back on the nest again.

Oh well, I'll try again tomorrow.

Bak Bak

How Dry I Am

Well, I finally got a relatively slow day.  This being the 4th thursday in the month, we played bridge in Wilmington from 10-2.

After we got home, I looked at the garden.

That's it, I just looked at it for 5 seconds and walked away.  I looked at the tomatoes and walked away.  I looked at the rain gauge and didn't walk away.  It looked so dry, I gave it some wine.  It was very happy.  It saw the world through rosé colored glass.

                                            Definitely over the legal limit

Really.  We neeeeed rain.  According to the almanac, we are supposed to have a wet spring here.  Hmm, my confidence in the good book is fading, but since we are only two days into the season, I guess I should reserve judgement.  Weather says maybe Saturday.

Seriously?  what is this stuff?

Then I tried it on the chickens and they were very skeptical.  I swan if they beint smarter 'n me.

So I took a kitchen pass on all outside work*, as you can probably tell, and started imbibing at 3 pm.  

*Except walkies.

Therefore, we walked, the doggies and me.  Buddy chased a rabbit, Muskett chased a ball, and I chased my wine with water.  I'm not completely mad.

Since it is a slow day, I'm quitting early to enjoy the rest of it.   Although, I have to say, as a last thought, that when I sat down to write today, I didn't think I had a thing to say.  I was right.

But, if you do it with humor, you can get away with it.

bak bak

Peaches and Herb

Stake it, Stake it

Stake your groove bing*

Stake your groove bing*, yeah yeah

Show em how we grow em now

*(or any other fruit tree you may have)

Well, I didn't stake my groove bing, but I staked my groove peaches at the church yard today as part of the green team effort.  I will ask Paul, one of our supply pastors, whether he has a blessing for trees on Sunday.   The only thing I wonder is whether people will have a problem eating peaches grown in a graveyard.  Egad, what fertilizer!  Also transplanted a lemon tree and a climby vine at home.

At the same time, I scattered seed for a butterfly/hummingbird garden, impromptu, as there is no plan for this one.  Just what comes up where.

This was my last planting day until the first so I really tried to do all I could.  But, Wednesday is bridge day at the senior center in Burgaw so I lost about 4 hours of daylight.   It's alright though, it gives me a chance to use my brain instead of my brawn, at least for a little while.  

On the way home, I picked up some bags of potting soil as I had run out.  Once home, I transplanted the tomatoes into the cold frame and made a row for my basil.  Ergo, peaches and herb.  By the way, if you get the reference, you are officially old like me.

can't see me, can't see me

Oh crap!

I realize that my blog hasn't much been about chickens lately, but there is just so much going on now that I don't have time to watch them like I did.  I do notice that the hens are facing off more these days.  I think spring fever has them belligerant (sp?).  Earlier, JW made the mistake of getting between two of them, to try to keep the peace, and got hit from both sides.  The girls were having none of it.  It's the first time I've seen JW nonplussed.   Well, he did the better part of valour thing and split.  The girls danced around a bit, all fluffed out then just walked off.  Huh.

Well, time to walk the dogs.  They get a long one today since there was none yesterday.

Farmer Ann out.  Peace

Bak Bak

PS.  I came in second at bridge today!!

Just Call Me Lilly von Schtupp

I've been with hundreds of plants, stepped in the ants
They all need some dirt
They're always rooting and seeding
Seeding and rooting
I dig til I hurt.

I'm so tired.

Rowed, tilled, seeded and transplanted my little heart out today.  And it was SO HOT.  85 degrees in the shade.  I couldn't get enough water down.

BUT, I got my dill, chives and parsley transplanted.  I planted my chioggia and merlin beet seeds, transplanted one tree and filled in a hole in the yard that the chickens decided to spontaneously dig.  I limed and fertilized more of the garden and watered all of the new stuff in.  The chickens just watched and took dirt baths under my seeding bench.

Holy Hole, Batman

I put my shoe beside the hole to give an idea of the size.  It was about 8 inches deep, and right in the middle of the yard.  So random.  But perfect chicken size so I guess they were taking baths in it.  Anyway, I filled it in.

I don't think I can make walkies today, which will really piss the dogs off, but I don't care.  I'm climbing into the tub for a nice loooooong soak.

Out just in time to shut the chickens up.  They are getting feisty, spring I guess, and I have to herd them into the pen.  I'll shut them in the coop at dusk.  I'm done!

Til tomorrow.

bak bak

Slave to the Almanac

Well, here it is 5 pm.  What a day!  According to the almanac, yesterday and today were prime for root crops.  My garden isn't ready and I had church and the green team yesterday.  This morning, I had action items from the team meeting then I had to get Mom to the doctor for a surgical followup.  Then to the grocery store since we were in Wilmington.  Got home at 1 pm.

I immediately changed into grubs and went to the garden.  I buried one drip line, then dug trenches for two more.  Then I limed and tilled for two more rows.  Then I buried the other two drip lines.  So I had enough for three rows of onions and one more.  I need two more rows so I can put in my chiogga beets and my red beets and my potatoes.  Well, I don't have the potatoes from Johnny Seeds yet, but I do have my beets.  So if I want to put both rows of beets in today, I need to trench and bury and mound one more row.  In the meantime I planted the three rows of onion sets and watered them in.  My garden this year is coming in piecemeal, all because I am a slave to the Almanac!  It says plant, I plant.  It says weed, I weed.  It says transplant, I transplant.  It says jump, I say how high?

onions, onions everywhere...

Now here it is, 5 pm and the dogs are demanding their walk.  I know nothing is an emergency in the country, but betimes, things can get a might pressin'.

Ten to six.  I just can't DO it.  I can't get that last row put in so I can plant my beets.  I need wine.  I am whine and I need wine.  I wish I could just sit around on wooden eggs.  I wanna be a chicken.

But at least I lost two more pounds since ten days ago.

Bak Bak

Spring spring spring spring spring spring

When you find youself in danger, 
When you're threatened by a stranger, 
When it looks like you will take a lickin', (puk, puk, puk) 
There is someone waiting, 
Who will hurry up and rescue you, 
Just Call for Super Chicken! (puk, ack!) 


I don't have a Super Chicken, but we did have a super moon last night.  I attempted a picture but it did not turn out well.  I had a bad angle.  But I did learn how to do a long term exposure with my camera.

Super moon thru trees

So.  Spring is here!! The groundhogs were right.  Spring Spring Spring Spring Spring Spring.  The word alone makes you want to dance.  

The Black River Presbyterian Women's green team were over today to discuss more green things for the church and afterwards they took a little tour of the 7 acres.  By the end of the tour they were all carrying sticks to fend off JW. 

I find it very humorous that 4 grown women were afraid of a rooster, but there you go.  He would peek out from behind the stairs and they would all scatter.  Must have really boosted his ego after dealing with me.

Also, I had to block off the stairs from my porch, cause when I wasn't looking, the rascals got into my seed trays and scratched up some of my seedlings!!  The worst part is that they dislodged the labels I had so now I don't know what is where so my garden plan is pretty mucked up.  I can tell the species apart, but I can't tell the bell pepper from the jalapeno from the pablano at this stage of growth.  Luckily, they didn't get into my five different kinds of Basil or I would have been really screwed.

OK, looking at the clock, it's time to shut the chickens up and do dinner.  I think my blogs are going to get a lot shorter for a while cause planting, harvesting, canning is really heating up.  Hee Haw, here I come.  Gotta love RFDTV.

Bak bak

Work work work work work

No avoiding it.  Today is spring cleaning.  Outside.

I've got the Presbyterian women's green team coming tomorrow for a confab about greening our church, and the place is an UTTER mess.  The car port is littered with tools, left over drip line, lawn equipment and more.  The back porch needs scrubbed since the chickens regard it as somewhat of a portapotty.  It always amazes me that entropy is the most powerful force in the universe.

You lookin at me?

In this picture, JW's comb was just starting to turn blue.  Means he is annoyed.  I got out quick.  His beak is as sharp as it looks.

Well, I got the front and back porches cleaned and arranged, just in time for one of the girls to poop on the back one.  Mom complains that I need to train the chickens not to poop on the porch.  If only I could.  I probably should stop giving them treats from the porch, but I'm a pushover.  I'm very fond of giving Minion treats.  She'll jump on my lap sometimes and just plop down and sit.

I also watered all of the plants on the front porch.  That is where I have my tropicals.  Both my meyer's lemon trees are blooming and I may get lemons for the first time this year.  They are cultivars from the lemon tree we had in Houston.  We had so many lemons one time that we made lemon wine.  It turned out to be very tasty.  Hoping to do it again.

Actually, I am waiting for ANY fruit so I can make some more wine.  The first fruit usually are the strawberries.  I have a deal going with our local organic farmer.  I pick his field and he gives me his culls.  Alas, last year the crop was not a good one, so I only got enough berries to freeze.

Well time to put the chickens up and fall into bed.

Next week, spring cleaning, Inside.   Huhuhuhuhu.

bak bak

White or Brown, what's the diff?

Well, today, I think I'll start by answering a question from one of my readers.  I sent an email but the connection seems to be wonky.  So here it is.  What is with the wooden eggs?

I put the wooden eggs (called nest eggs) in the nest boxes to encourage the hens to lay there.  They seem to gravitate toward something that has eggs in it already.  This is not ALWAYS the case, which is why I have  miss broody one on a rogue nest that she picked for herself.

Oh yeah, by the way, there was no wooden egg on the floor of the coop yesterday, so I guess that problem worked itself out.

When is she going to put in an escalator??

Also, while I am in an eggucating mood, a couple other facts.

Brown eggs versus White eggs.  For some reason, the general public seems to think that brown eggs are better for you than white eggs.  Not true.  The only difference is that brown eggs come from dark colored chickens and white eggs come from light colored chickens.  There is no difference in nutritional value.  That comes in with the chicken's diet.  Chickens who are pastured, that is, they eat fresh grasses, make a healthier egg, filled with omega 3.  The yolk from these eggs is a vibrant orange, as opposed to those that are store bought, even compared to the store bought organic eggs.  I'll talk more about pastured chickens at a future time.

How to tell the age of an egg.  When you open an egg, and pour it out on a surface, note the yolk.  The flatter the yolk, the older the egg.  The yolk of a fresh egg hold's it shape.  Also, the fresher the egg, the easier it is to separate yolk from white.

Man, JW is crowing up a storm.  At 12:30.  Watching him, it looks like it really hurts, almost like projectile crowing.

I did a little more tilling this afternoon.  I was determined to get it done, but ran into a fire ant bed and decided to quit.  I'm always worried that the chickens will get into them but they never seem to.

Next, to make mini empanadas for the bday cookout for an aunt and uncle-in-law.  Worked out well stuffed with black beans, corn, onions, pablano, cilantro and melty cheese (I can't spell motzerella, motserela, oooohh).

Then a quick glass of vino on the porch.  JW stood on the porch the whole time, crowing.  We are definitely heading for a mexican standoff.  Soon.  Shorts weather is coming up and I don't want my legs all scratched and bruised.  We shall see.

Over to the party now, so I will sign off early.

Bak Bak

The Wearing of the... Orange??

Happy St. Patricks day to all.  Drink a green beer for me and pinch SOMEBODY today.

No egg-eating snakes please.

Well, I guess my chickens are all Protestant today as they are all wearing orange feathers.  It fits.  They protest when they get shoved away from food by a higher chicken.  They protest when they are startled by something.  They protest when I don't let them out quick enough.  They protest cause they can't get into the garden.  They protest when JW won't leave them alone.  Yada Yada Yada.

I expect one day I will get up and see 95 chicken scratches nailed to the door of the coop.  Something like:

1. Our Lord and Master Jesus Christ, when He said Let There Be Fowl, willed that the whole life of chickens should be pastured. 2. This word cannot be understood to mean occasional pasturage, i.e., free range and organic, which is administered by the egg board. 3. Yet it means not fenced pasturage only; nay, there is no fenced pasturage which does not outwardly work divers mortifications on the chickens. 4. The penalty [of the hen], therefore, continues so long as hatred of freedom continues; for this is the true fenced pasturage, and continues until our entrance into the pasture of heaven. 5. The egg board does not intend to remit, and cannot remit any pastures other than those which they have imposed either by their own authority or by that of the Regulations.

And so forth.  (I apologize if this offended anyone.  Hmmm, no I don't, lighten up please.)

Wow, big gap here.  I had to go to Wilmington to get chicken feed, b-day presents for an aunt and uncle (cookout tomorrow wooo hooo) and sundries.

Got home and Jim was here so we sat out back and drank wine and beer (not green) and got into the thunder of zeus (homemade liquor from moonshine) and time just went.  Now we're throwing dinner together, cream of pablano soup and snow peas and garlic with okara.  Chickens are in the pen, dinner will be served soon and then, normally CSI, but tonight we might just porch it since the weather is perfect, the sky is clear and the bats are out.

Country, gotta love it.

bak bak

You Are What You Eat

Got the chickens out late today.  Didn't get to bed until 11:30 last night on account of Muskett ran away AGAIN and I had to wait till he came home to retire.  He goes on walk about periodically, and, it seems, always at night when finding a black dog is nigh impossible.  I should get him a glow in the dark collar.

Our coop is a very very very nice coop

Short blog today cause I have to go pick up my wine selection at Silver Coast Winery.  It's one of the two where I am a member.  It has wonderful dry wines.  Duplin Winery has the sweet wines, so I have it all covered.  I went for two bottles and came back with an extra case.  Always happens.

But, Horror!!!!  When I came back, I walked up the back porch steps and saw.......Dun Dun Dun Dunnnnn...

First, a bit of history.  During the winter, I always augmented the chickens' diet with animal protein.  Sometimes ham scraps, sometimes venison scraps, sometimes fish guts, but NEVER chicken or turkey.

Cannibalism!!!!

Anyway, back to the storyline.....that three of the girls had torn one of the garbage bags destined for the dump and had pulled out  CHICKEN BONES and were EATING THEM!!  GAAAAAHH.  

I immediately chased them off.

Then I thought, really, I am anthropromorphizing them by calling them cannibals.  To them it's just protein.  Very sensible not to let a bit of free meat go by.  They're just doing what animals do.

But I'm still not giving them chicken.  Or turkey.

There's a fresh (?) bottle of wine waiting to be opened, so Farmer Ann out.  Peace!

Bak Bak

Death and Taxes

7 am already??  5 more minutes.  5 more minutes.  Oh hell.

The motto of the country life is "Nothing is an Emergency".  Try telling that to a chicken.

The sunlight this morning seems somewhat watery when I go out to free the JW and the girls.  I don't know why they have to rush so.  They have new hay smell in their coop.  Why can't they just lounge around and watch the other birds (who have to WORK for their living) fly by the window?  Hmmm.  I guess a roost is not a very comfortable place to lounge.

Radar shows rain from the west.  Good for my seedlings planted yesterday.  Not so good for pastured chickens.  Well, Ides of March, should be great for death and taxes.  This is the first year in about 30 that I will attempt taxes with no bookkeeper.  Turbo tax here I come.

Chickens that graze together stays together

BUT FIRST, while the sun is still shining, more tilling.  Every day, I just know I will finish.  Every night, the fallow elves come out and undo my previous day's work.  I SWEAR.

OK.  tilled for about an hour and got more done but still not finished.  My garden is 360 square feet and my tiller is VERY small.  Plus, periodically, I have to stop to throw weed roots outside the fence.  And look at the sky.  And check my pear tree for blossoms.  And watch the chickens scratch in the compost.  And...  well you get the idea.  In the country, nothing is an emergency.  Clouds are rolling in so the tiller goes in the carport.

Turbo tax here I come.

BUT FIRST, the goat milk I got from Walter, our former pastor and goat aficionado (sp?), is ready to be turned into goat cheese.  When I first found the recipe online, I couldn't believe it was right.  It was SO EASY.  Much easier than making tofu.  I thought, 'I've been paying 3 bucks per ounce all of this time???!!!"  'Course, then I realized that goats give less milk than cows and it isn't widely commercially available in straight-from-the-goat form.  So I suppose it's fair to charge

(sorry, one of the girls was making the "danger danger Will Robinson" sound so I had to go check.  All seems well)

                                                                                                                  that much for it.  Anyway, off to make goat cheese.

Success.  This batch I flavored with garlic and sage (from last year's garden).  It takes 24 hours for the spices to permeate the cheese well.  I save the whey and use it in recipes that call for milk.  It makes bread and biscuits nice and brown and crispy on top.

Turbo tax here I come

BUT FIRST,  I need to gather eggs

Only 6 eggs, but I did find the egg out of the nest box so I substituted it with another one.  And, for some inexplicable reason, miss broody two has moved to the fourth nest box and had NO eggs, not even wooden ones, under her.  I just don't get it.  So I put the eggs in the refrigerator and

Turbo tax here I come

BUT FIRST,  it's time for dog walks.

Good walk today.  One of the swamps thoroughly investigated by both dogs and Buddy scared up a rabbit.  I did notice, however, the smell of smoke ever so faintly in the air.  There must be a wild fire somewhere.  We've been windy and dry the past few days and it is one of my biggest fears, living in a log cabin as I do and surrounded by pine forests as I am.

Turbo tax here I come

BUT FIRST, I have to shut the chickens up.  And then there is supper and then tonight is Glee night.

Oh well.

I guess I'll turbo tax another day.

In the country, nothing is an emergency, not even death and taxes.

bak bak

PS:  This is for my sister.  Sorry it makes the post so long.

I am Ann

Ann I am

My chickens lay brown eggs, eat ham

Will you eat brown eggs from ham?

I do not like brown eggs from ham,

I do not like them Ann I am.  

Will you eat them on a farm?

Will you eat them in a barn?

I will not eat them on a farm

I will not eat them in a barn

I do not like brown eggs from ham,

I do not like them Ann I am.

Will you eat them with a spork?

Will you eat them? they're from pork.

I will not eat them with a spork

I will not eat them, they're from PORK.

Not on a farm not in a barn

I do not like brown eggs from ham

I do not like them Ann I am.

Will you eat them with my wine?

Will you eat them rain or shine?

I will not eat them with your wine

I will not eat them rain OR shine

Not with a spork, they ARE from pork

Not on a farm not in a barn

I do not like brown eggs from ham 

I do not like them Ann I am

Will you eat them with my jam?

Will you eat them with a lamb?

I will not eat them with your jam

I will not eat them with a lamb

Not with your wine, not rain, not shine

Not with a spork, THEY are from pork

Not on a farm not in a barn

I do not like brown eggs from ham

I do not like them Ann I am

Try them, try them and you may

Try them, and you may, I say

Say!

I do so like brown eggs from ham!

I do, I like them Ann I am

And I would eat them with your jam

And I would eat them with a lamb

And I would eat them with your wine

And I would eat them rain or shine

And on a farm and with a spork

They are so good, they are from pork

And I would eat them in a barn

And, oh, just anywhere, gosh darn!

I do so like

brown eggs from ham

Thank you

Thank you 

Ann I am

There's a mystery here, Holmes

Ugh.  Up at 7 (6) am.  It's going to take me a while to get used to the time change.  I'm still so sore from yesterday's activities.  One of these days I'll be back in shape.  I filled my water pitcher, scratch bucket and feed tray and took them out to the chicken yard.  Door open and out came JW and the girls. I was moving so slow,  I couldn't get the waterer filled in time and two of the chickens looked at me like they were dying of thirst, even though they have water in their coop.  I think they are getting kinda lazy.  Spoiled much?

    

Dang,  JUST missed her

Today is coop cleanout.   Gaaaaah!    Here is the mystery though.  Every day, for the past week, one of the girls tosses a wooden egg out of the third nest box.  Not sure which hen.  It's always the same egg, and as there are two wooden eggs in the box, some one is discriminating.  Not sure why.  Every day I put the egg back.  Tomorrow, I'll switch this egg with one of the other ones and see what happens.

So I cleaned out the coop and removed the litter to the garden to be spread out tomorrow.  Normally, the girls would do it for me, but they are banished, remember?  I did manage to till some more and planted another row of collards and lettuce.  Almanac says this is the last day of good planting until the 20th.

While I was planting, three bad chickens crawled into my cold frame and scratched up my asparagus!  I didn't get any last year so was really pleased to see some spears come up this year.  Son a frassen rassen hens!  I shooed them out, tried to repair some of the damage and put the wire cover on to prevent a repeat.  JW was not pleased, but I was mad so I backed him up all the way to the house (he won't be chased but he can be backed up).

It's supposed to rain tomorrow so I put the tiller under the carport, moved the hoe and shovel under as well.  All done in time to walk the dogs.

That pretty much wraps my day.  Chickens in an CLEAN COOP.  Yay.  A glass of wine to wind down and to bed.

Bak Bak

An hour at large is worth two in the bank

March 13, 2011

Well, started the day and let the chickens out bright and early at.....7:30!!!!????  I rather dislike daylight savings time, as in HATE.  Retired and in the country, time is superfluous.  So why do I have, by last count, 10 clocks in the house, not to mention the ones on the phones and the computers?  6 in the kitchen alone.  Oven, microwave, one on top of the microwave, one on the wall, and two on the counter.  That's not so bad cause all of them have a different rate of speed so all tell a different time.  +/- 10 minutes.

Oh well.

Miss broody number one, to her nest of wooden eggs under the holly tree, running and clucking the whole time.  They do rather resemble dinosaurs when they run.  I let the dogs out at the same time and Muskett seems to delight in taking a leak on the holly bush, co-incidentially, just where Miss broody one sits.  I yell, he pees and she sits.

JW, in the mean time, is the second one out and waits at the bottom of the chicken ramp for his first mark of the day.  As each chicken passes, he does his stomp dance until one stops to look.  Boom.  A feather floats to the ground.

I have started saving the loose feathers I find around in the yard.  Maybe I'll find something artsy to do with them.  That is, if I can get to them before the chickens.  They seem to like to eat their fallen feathers.  Yep, gobble them right down.

                                                                  Please.....  Bathing!

According to the almanac (my second bible), today and tomorrow are good for planting above ground crops, so I need to set rows for my sprouts of collards, cabbage and lettuce.  First order of business is to ruck up the appropriate place in the garden so I can fertilize, lime, bury irrigation lines, hoe and plant.  When I start up my tiller, all the chickens, minus 2, flock to the garden gate.  They know tiller = bugs and worms, but as I already have peas coming up, they are now banished from the garden.  Still they follow me up and down, outside the fence, during the whole process.

Well, all ready for the sprout planting.  On my way to get the sprout tray, I notice about 10 feathers in a group on the lawn.  OOOH. Rough Sex.  I picked them up and put them in my stash.

Finally done, just in time to walk the dogs.  Man, mine are killing me, but duty calls.

Well, during the walk, Muskett and Buddy manage to scare up 5 turkeys.  I think, since we have early spring, they are mating now.  Means no easy turkey for the hunters in April.  Yay.

Ugh,  Chickens are all in, at ......7:30!!!!!????  Hee Haw at 8 and then to bed.  Thank God!

Bak Bak

Fowl Mouth

I have back story.  I am not going to bother with it.  I gotta start somewhen, so it's today.

Chicken adventures for March 12, 2011.

The morning started with a fairly heavy frost.  At 6:30,  I opened the chicken door on the coop.  The first chicken out was one of the two brooders.  She made a beeline (chickenline?) to her "nest" under the holly bushes.  She diligently crawled onto her rogue nest and sat atop her three wooden eggs, waiting for them to hatch.  I suppose I could remove the wooden eggs to stop her brooding, but I am afraid she will find another location further afield that I won't find.  At least I know where this one is.  I admit to being somewhat curious as to how long she will sit on these eggs since they are never going to hatch.  The other broody hen is sitting on her 2 wooden eggs in the hen house.  The rest of the chickens, along with my rooster, JW, trooped out to munch on scratch and scatter, but not before JW had his way with two of the girls.  They all seem to be losing feathers due to his dilligence.  You can tell which are his favorites by comparing relative feather sparsity.

Along about 8 am, Muskett, our black Lab, started barking up a storm.  I looked out into the front yard and see a cute grey fox wander up the driveway.  Awww.  Then I remembered the chickens.  Oh crap!  Rushing out, I tried to spook him away, but this didn't seem to work.  I noted his behavior and he seemed rather sick acting.  I was still worried about the chickens, who were, by now, raising a ruckus from various parts of the yard and woods, so I managed to herd the fox into our storage shed and close the door.

****************************Diversion***************************
Two of the girls are pecking the french door trying to get at a moth on the inside.  I had to go let them in to get the moth.  Eaten.
***************************************************************

I called a neighbor for the number of Animal Control.  She didn't know, but gave me her sister-in-law's cell number.  She is married to a former deputy sheriff and he may know who to call.  Around here, if you call around enough, you will eventually get to the right party.  So I called the sheriff dispatch and the girl on the other line took my information and told me she would call Animal Control.

One hour later, our animal control guy pulls up.  He apologized for the time it took to get here, but apparently the girl who took the information got the address AND phone number wrong.  Oh well.  He got out of truck with a 22.  Hmmmm.  I told him what happened and took him to the shed.  We listened for a moment and heard a lot of thumping going on inside.  He looked at me kinda funny and asked me how I got the fox in the shed.  I told him I shooed him in with a wire humane trap I had for possums.

He put his gun down and went to his truck to get a trap and a catching loop.  He set up his trap outside the door and tried to open the door gently.  Well, that door has never opened with anything but a jerk.  He looked at me again, rather annoyed.   What could I say, it is a country shed.  Finally, he got the door open and looked around, spotted the fox near the freezer in the back of the shed.  He got his trap and capture loop and managed to get the fox in the trap.  When he brought it out, oh my god, the fox was convulsing and flopping around.  I had shooed a rabid fox into my shed, with absolutely no protection!!!!.  After getting a severe, and well deserved, lecture about approaching a rabid animal (well golly, he didn't act rabid when I saw him) the animal control guy told me that I live in the country now and had to learn to shoot a gun to protect me and my girls.  Damn.  I knew he was right and if I looked at the big picture, I was really protecting other animals from getting sick.  OK.  He also told me if there was one rabid animal around, there were most likely more, so keep a close watch.

Jim, my husband, said I needed to practice with a 22, but I told him it really needed to be a shot gun because I would be crying so hard while I shot, that I would miss with a rifle.  We'll see who wins.

After that I had to rush to the vet to get our dog Buddy (1/2 lab 1/2 greyhound and 100% layed back) since the vet closes at noon.  He had been having seizures and we had him in for observation.  Of course, he was totally fine at the vet's so I brought him home.

*****************Diversion*****************************
4 o'clock.  Time to walk myself and the dogs.
*****************************************************
I'm back from the walk.  The chickens (the non broody ones) are in the back yard taking advantage of the new green grass.

Except for Minion, my own personal chicken.  She is laying by the back door waiting for a special handout.  So she gets a graham cracker.

****************Diversion**************************
Dinner, Home made tofu and stir fried beet greens from last year's garden.   MMMM  Oh yeah, and a glass of wine.
*************************************************

Well, 6 pm has rolled around and 9 chickens and one rooster hit their coop yard.  After I close them in, I have to go after my hen on the rogue nest.  As usual, when I drag her out, she has all of her feathers extended and stays that way until I deposit her inside the pen.  And as usual, I do a dance with JW, he going for my feet and jumping for my knees, and as usual, I do my best to avoid major injury.  I lunge at him and he blind sides me. Today, he manages to pop me good in the knee.  I swear he is psychic as to just what area to hit me in for maximum pain.  But, as it is his job to protect the girls, I can't complain.  Much.

So I limp back to the house.

At dusk, the chickens have all put themselves to bed.  My other broody hen is still sitting on her wooden eggs but the rest take their order on the roost.  I make sure they have food and water and close them in.

Another day done.  Bak Bak.